RP Communication

[junebug]

Ok, say you and your rp buddy are almost finished with the preparations when you realize you forgot to ask for a basic character sheet in your thread (name, age, gender, basic personality, basic history, picture, etc.), so you ask nicely for one because that's what you usually do with partners. You've also done one yourself ahead of time, but unfortunately, your partner says they don't do CS and lists reasons why, such as behavior is best explained in IC. What would you do? Would you let it go? Would you try and explain firmly that these are your rules even if you forgot to mention it in the rp search thread?

I'm considering just letting it go, but CSes are important for me, as they give the roleplay structure and structure is what I feel more comfortable with and ready with. I explained why I wanted a CS and asked nicely but they were persistent in not doing one. I know it's kind of petty to ask when I could just be like it's not a big deal, but I've never dealt with this sort of thing before when a partner doesn't want to do a CS and I'm just not sure how to go about the situation because I'm not a people person. :P

Thank you to anyone who gives me their bit of advice.

 

[Kagayours]

:/ You have your rules and reasons for wanting CS's. But your partner also has their own rules and reasons for not doing CS's. And if both of you had known from the start that you were incompatible in this regard, I'm assuming you would never have even planned an RP in the first place.

So, I think it's important to discuss whether or not the RP can still work between the two of you. And if not, then one of you is going to have to make some sacrifices. Either you continue the RP without a CS from your partner, or your partner agrees to make a CS. And if neither one of you is willing to make sacrifices, then you can't have an RP.

You could also try to maybe find some sort of compromise, where your partner maybe doesn't need to write a full CS, but just... something similar to a CS. Perhaps just a very basic one. Or, if your partner's issues with CS's lie not with the amount of content required but just with the concept of filling out a list of traits, then maybe they could write a sample scene for their character that shows us a glimpse of their personality. I know that such a thing may not be exactly what you wanted, but, again, if you want to have a CS, then at least one of you is going to have to make sacrifices. And, this way, at least that burden won't be placed entirely on one person.

So, instead of just begging your partner to write a CS, I think it should be framed more like: "Ok, we have a problem here. If we both stick strictly to our rules, then we're incompatible as partners and we can't RP together. And if neither of us wants to make compromises, then we can just call this a loss and drop the RP. But if we really want to make the RP work, then we have to decide specifically which sacrifices either of us will have to make."

And if your partner refuses to budge at all, and you're still really not cool with that, then, it's up to you to decide whether or not the RP is worth pursuing. You are allowed to just drop the RP if your partner isn't matching your standards. And if you tell your partner that you want to drop, and they beg you to stay... well then, I guess it's back to the negotiations table.

 

[Vars]

+1 to everything Kaga said.

Also, have you explained why character sheets are important to you? Because if all you have been doing is asking for a character sheet, then your partner is probably writing it off as it not being a huge deal or you being too picky. If you could explain why they are important to you and how they help with the rp and your participation/planning of it, then it gives more of an opportunity for your partner to empathize with you.

 

[junebug]

@Kagayours I'd love to try out that scene sample with their character. I feel that would at least be something, if not exactly what I asked for. Thank you for the suggestion!

@Vardoger Yes, I made my stance clear to them on why I feel CSes are important to me. I get a feel for the character and plus, it's predictable. I don't care for unpredictability and spontaneity. I prefer structure and I don't like surprises. I like to at least know what I'm going in with. :)

 

[Applo]

I'd say trying to find some middle ground to meet on would be the best bet like Kaga and Vardoger have said. That being said seeing as you are in the situation, if it were me I might be tempted to think about moving forwards without a CS as an experiment. Perhaps you find that you still don't like it, but you might find yourself surprised and find that it doesn't bother you as much as it might have in the past. Comfort zones are nice but it is good to try stepping outside them occasionally. Ultimately though, follow your instincts on what you feel is the best way forward.

 

[Elle Joyner]

Could you possibly compromise on the sheet? Maybe just make is very basic? No personality... Maybe just a bio section with one or two paragraphs of pertinent info? Might work best if it's got a less regimented feel to it? Maybe even suggest it's just a reference sheet so you have something to look to if you forget their age or whatever?

 

[The Mood is Write]

Hmm...

Perhaps you could suggest something like doing a minimalistic CS? Something with important and easily-forgotten details, like appearance and a very brief summary of backstory?

That way, you get your CS, but your partner isn't giving you EVERYTHING, and still gets to ease you into learning about their character.

As an example, something like this:

Name:
Christine Hong

Age:
24.

Sexual and Romantic Identity and Preference:
Asexual, polyromantic. Cis female.

Hair Style and Color:
Her black hair is shaved on one side and kept in messy curls on the other. It's naturally straight.

Eye Shape and Color:
Her brown eyes have a monolid (no crease above the eye). They slant downward.

Misc Facial Features:
Her nose is slightly lopsided, and she has a dimple on her right cheek.

Height:
4'10"

Body Type:
A bit of meat on those bones.

Fashion Preferences:
Jeans and fun blouses.

Overview:
This college dropout has a reputation as a partier, but they're also spotted often at the local cafe, quietly reading.

 

[junebug]

Thank you guys for all of the advice! I started off with the notion of just receiving a scene sample, but my partner has yet to respond. I'm sure they're just busy because of the holidays, but I wonder haha! Again, thank you all. I appreciate the help! ^_^