[Samuel x Roman]

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Rabbit

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m a t t h e w

Matthew was by his desk, deeply concentrated, all focus on his writing when his wife came into the room. He didn't detect the worry and nerves in her voice right away and continued to type away as he didn't want to lose the sentence. Elissa would know that was what he was doing, he didn't need to tell her to wait a second to not make her worry he was ignoring her or something. She knew how important this was, he was at the last book in his series and he just needed it to be perfect.

Once he had gotten all of it out he turned to his wife, ad then he noticed immediately how nervous she was. From the way she was biting her lip to the fidgeting with her sleeve. And seeing his wife worried instantly made Matthew worried as well. Few things could get him riled up as easily as his family and that went for every emotion.

He stood and headed over to Elissa at once.He pulled her into a big hug and pressed a kiss on her cheek, "Is something the matter?" he asked, a twinge of worry colouring his usually inexpressive voice.
 

lxngdon

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e l i s s a
Elissa wrapped her arms around Matthew and hid in his chest when he pulled her into a hug. Now that he had noticed her, she just felt a thousand times more nervous. How was he going to react? What if he was mad? What if he wanted her to terminate the pregnancy -- or he left her because he had never wanted another child?

Elissa immediately scolded herself for that thought. It was ludicrous -- Matthew loved her and she loved him. He wasn't going to leave her for this. They could work through it together ... but she needed to tell him first.

"I ... I don't know ... whether it's good or not depends on how you take it."
Elissa pulled back, unable to meet Matthew's gaze, and fished into the pocket of her cardigan. She clasped the pregnancy test but didn't pull it out as she finally forced herself to look up and meet in his gaze. And in her eyes was the sort of conviction only a mother could hold regarding anything to their children. It was a type of fierceness, an insistence that told Matthew she had made up her mind, but also told him that she wanted nothing more than his support.

She pulled out the test, and pressed it into his hand. "I ... I'm pregnant."
 

Rabbit

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m a t t h e w

Matthew held Elissa for a moment as she seemed to hesitate. He really worried not knowing what could have happened for her not to just tell him straight out, but he was still patient enough to not try to push it. He'd wait forever for her to be comfortable. He did speculate though, was something going on at work, like the stupid thing that had happened with Brooklyn ages ago? Had something happened to Will that he had entrusted in her ad now she was retelling? What if it was something serious.

Elissa pulled back. Matthew didn't know what on earth could be good or not based on her reaction util she pushed an item into his hand. He stared at it. The words "I'm pregnant" echoing in his head. Then he looked at Elissa, then back down at the test. They used protection and didn't even have sex all that often, so the odds of this happening was so low. Yet it had happened and.... Matthew had no idea how to feel. On one hand this was wonderful news and he wanted to happily pull her into a hug. A kid. Another kid. That was fantastic no matter if they had planned it or not. But on the other, Elissa wasn't in her twenties, or even thirties anymore. A pregnancy at this age wasn't always a good thing.

He took a deep breath, "Okay," he said and then he leaned in, pressed a kiss on her forehead and pulled her back into a hug. He wanted to reach down and touch her tummy, feeling himself fill up with similar feelings as when she had revealed she was pregnant with Will. But he was also scared and he needed to ask a hard question first, "Are we... Are you... What do you want to do? It could be very dangerous, Elissa,"
 

lxngdon

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e l i s s a
He didn't react positively, but he didn't react negatively either. Elissa was one of the few people who could read Matthew pretty well, but now, even she had no idea what he was thinking. He did, however, pull her into a close hug, and therefore she assumed he wasn't mad, or actively disapproving of the news she had told him.

He posed a very fair question, and she decided to give him a very fair answer. "I know," she told him. "I did the research, before I took the test. I know the risks. I'm not saying this unprepared."

She pulled back and looked up at him with that same fierce conviction in her beautiful eyes. "But I want to have this baby," she told him in a soft tone that did not match her hardened gaze. "When I took the test, and even before, I thought about this baby the same way I did when I found out I was pregnant with Will, because even if I'm older and it's dangerous, it's still our baby. So, I want to have them."

She slid her hands down to grip his own. "What do you think?" she asked. "Because I'm going to need all the support I can get."
 

Rabbit

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m a t t h e w

Metthew bit his lip. Elissa wanted to have this baby. He had just found out about it but the idea of having another child wasn't a bad one, he loved Will with all of his heart, he was growing up fast, he wouldn't mind sharing that love for another kid. And especially now that he was much more flexible with work.

But it didn't change the fact that this was very dangerous.

Matthew didn't know what he'd do without Elissa. And even thinking that something like that made his stomach twist with worry. He needed her and he loved her and he didn't think anything in the world was worth losing her for. However if this was what she wanted it was what she wanted and he was going to support her.

"You have my full support, I promise, I'm with you," he said softly and kissed her forehead again, "It's our baby, I wouldn't leave you to deal with this alone. Just as long as you always tell me if something feels wrong, okay? we can't be too careful."
 

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e l i s s a
When Matthew confirmed that he was in, Elissa let out a sigh of relief and rested her forehead against his chest. For a moment, she had really feared that he would not approve, and she didn't know where they would go from there if that had happened. They were both pretty stubborn people, and while they had yet to truly disagree on anything major, it was still a risk that they could get into a huge fight one day.

"I love you,"
she murmured. She could never say that enough. Elissa nuzzled his chest before pulling back and looking up at him. He was still such a ridiculously beautiful man, and Elissa would never tire from just looking at him. But it was more than that -- she loved his personality, his traits, his soul. She adored him so much.

"I'll tell you, I promise."
Elissa wasn't stupid, if something happened she would tell her husband right away. But she was hopeful that nothing would go wrong. Even if it was wishful thinking, all she wanted was to have this baby safely. And Elissa felt that her karma was aligned enough for that to be possible.
 

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s a m u e l

A week or so had passed since Harper had come out. Samuel had that night had a little talk with him and all was good in the hemlock Ortega house hold. Harper was still going to get to come out to his siblings by himself. Samuel hadn't grown up with siblings himself but after raising four children he could see why that wasn't the easiest task. Siblings loved to tease, it was affectionate but sometimes they struck a nerve. So clearly getting to the point on this one was going to be a little harder.

But another really changed. Harper was bi and that was great but they still had movie nights, hung out together and had their family meals, chatting and talking as usual, neither Samuel or Roman treating their boy any differently.

It was a lovely Friday night, and everyone had helped making tacos. It was one of those foods that were great because everyone could pick and choose what they wanted, which clearly was what worked the best in big families such as these. All the kids were seated, already helping themselves and Samuel and Roman had just gotten a chance to sit down after making sure everything was on the table when the familiar sound of Roman's phone going off was heard.

"Awe really? but family dinner," Samuel complained, "Will you keep it quick if it isn't important?"
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n
Roman let out a similar noise of complaint when his phone rung right before dinner. He checked the caller ID and he probably would have just ignored it if it hadn’t been his father. Roman had been talking to his parents more regularly as of late, because they were getting older and he wanted to make the most of the time he had left with them.

So he picked up the phone and went into the living room to take the call. “Hey, Dad.”

“Hey, buddy.” Immediately Roman noticed that something was off with his dad’s voice. But before Roman could ask anything, his father explained what had happened, and Roman listened in stunned silence.

His Uncle Hadley had passed away, finally succumbed to the illness that had been plaguing him for the past few years, and the funeral was going to be held soon. Roman couldn’t believe it. He knew his family members were ageing and that eventually they would pass on, but knowing something and having it happen were two entirely different things.

Roman talked to his father for a few moments, inquiring about his cousins and how everyone else had taken the news. He didn’t cry until he had hung up, and when he started he couldn’t stop. He buried his face into a couch cushion and sobbed uncontrollably into it, hoping that the kids didn’t come out to see him like this.
 

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s a m u e l

Samuel watched Roman get up cautiously. He never really knew whether or not to be worried when Roman left the room. It meant it wasn't just a seller or someone he could just say he'd talk to later. As of light Roman had been speaking a lot more with his parents over the phone, though, and during the conversation it wasn't uncommon for him to step aside so he could focus on it.

Samuel got it, he wanted to talk to his parents. He didn't have the luxury of having his parents close. Samuel was really glad his mother lived in Melbourne. It was still a bit of a drive to her and Oliver's place, but the whole family still visited frequently and she and oliver would come over for a coffee from time to time, allowing Samuel to meet her often and the kids to have a strong relationship with their grandma. They had a strong relationship with Ingrid too of course, the woman was fantastic. It was just that they couldn't visit them as often.

Samuel kept things going by the table, no one really thought about daddy being gone because they knew he was in a phone call and to not disturb him. So they all chatted about fun stuff and gave each other life updates now that everyone was gathered for their Friday meal and every one was a little less stressed as they had the weekend ahead of them. Eden was talking about bringing a friend to the stables, Harper had a soccer practice game, Stella wondered if June could come over so they could practice-- for the band they were starting, of course-- and Samuel told Letha that Allison had called and asked if she wanted to do something fun that weekend.

After a while though Samuel did start to get worried, even if it had been his parents they were having dinner and Roman would keep it on the shorter side. But he wasn't coming back. Samuel excused himself honestly by saying he was going to check on daddy and made his way to the living room.

His heart dropped when he heard to sound of muffled crying. Samuel hurried over to the couch and sat down, wrapping his arms around his husband, "Roman what's wrong? Was it your parents? Are they okay?" Samuel knew they were getting older, his own mother was too, but she was younger than Roman's parents.
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n
When Roman felt his husband's arms around him, he threw the cushion aside and buried his face in Samuel's shoulder instead. If Roman were more inclined with the societal values he had been raised with then he would have felt pathetic for being a forty-something year old man, crying like a baby. But Roman knew crying was okay, especially in the case of a death of a loved one, so he made no effort to hide his tears.

He couldn't answer Samuel at first, but after almost a whole minute of sobbing he managed to pull away and shake his head. "N - No, they're fine," he assured Samuel, one arm still around his shoulders.

"I - It's Uncle H - Hadley,"
he choked out. "H - he died the other night."

It just felt so strange to say. It seemed like only yesterday that he and Samuel had been coloured-haired teens, who were giggling over how Samuel found Roman's uncle attractive because they looked similar. But now he was gone. He had been struggling with a form of cancer for a few years, but that didn't change the fact that Roman hadn't been ready for him to pass away, and now, he didn't know what to do with himself.
 

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s a m u e l

Samuel instantly felt very worried when Roman just kept crying, unable to speak. Samuel didn't know what he'd do if they lost Ingrid or Stella. Sure some day it would happen and it would be awful. But it was just felt like it was way to soon or something like that to happen, and both his in-laws were happy and healthy, so it'd come out of nowhere.

Samuel wished he could say he was relieved when he heard what had happened, but he wasn't. The news were awful. Stellan and Ingrid were fine but Roman's uncle wasn't. Samuel kept his arms tightly around Roman, feeling his own eyes fill up with tears. Roman's relatives was his own family too. He saw them as often as Roman saw them, and even if it wasn't incredibly often this was horrible to hear. They had knew Uncle Hadley was sick obviously, but the possibility of him dying had still not really felt as real as it could happen.

"I'm sorry, love,"
he murmured and let out a small sniffle. Even if he was sad too this was truly more about Roman and he nuzzled his hair a little, "Was it the illness?"
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n
Roman sniffled again and nodded, affirming that it was the cancer that had finally won Hadley over. Since he had gotten sick a couple of years ago, Roman had tried to go up and see Hadley at least a couple of times a year, and speak to his cousins at least once a month to see how they were holding up. Roman had a big family, but he had always been closest with Hadley, even if they didn't talk that often due to dtistance.

But now Hadley was gone, and there was no coming back. Roman felt like he had just wasted so much time that he could have been spending with his favourite uncle. So many missed opportunities, so many memories they had never had the chance to make.

"The funeral's in a couple of weeks."
Roman sniffled once more, then pulled away from Samuel because he felt kind of overwhelmed and instead ran his hands over his face. "We have to go, we should find someone to have all the kids -- maybe Susan can have Letha and Hugo, and the twins can go with London and Evan and Harper can stay with Cameron? I don't know ... they're too young for that."
 

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s a m u e l

Samuel's heart ached. It was horrible to know such a good person had succumbed to something as horrible as cancer. He wouldn't even wish that upon his worst enemy and Hadley had always been such a genuinely sweet guy, and he had always been so close to Roman. He felt his own tears spill over but made sure they were quiet so that Roman could focus on his own sadness.

Roman proceeded to tell him about the funeral plans, the idea of a funeral made Samuel's stomach twist a little, the more Roman was saying the more it was really settling that Hadley was no more.

"Yeah we'll go, I'm sure my mum will take all of them if she needs to, don't worry about not being able to go, okay? We'll be there, I promise." he said gently, and reached over to cup Roman's cheek and gently rub his thumb along his cheek bone, "I think we should ask Harper if he wants to come at least, he's fifteen he should be allowed to choose,"
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n

Roman had been to a couple of funerals, but they had all been for distant family members he hardly knew but had been brought to out of obligation. He had never been to a funeral for someone that was important to him, and therefore, he didn't know how to prepare for this or how to mentally build himself up for the emotionally disturbing experience.

But he would have his husband there, and maybe even his son. He didn't want Harper to go, really, because even if he was fifteen he was still so young and he didn't need to see such darkness and devastation. But Samuel was right. He was old enough to make that decision for himself.

"Okay,"
Roman said with a nod. He reached up to wipe a couple of tears from his eyes, but it was no use, because they just welled over again straight away. "I ... I just can't believe he's gone."
 

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s a m u e l

Samuel was glad Roman didn't argue about asking Harper if he wanted to join the for the funeral, not that Roman really seemed to have it in him to do something like that now. Samuel just felt that they couldn't coddle the children completely. They were their babies, but they were getting older. Harper should definitely be allowed to decide himself, anything else would be disrespectful. And if any of the other kids asked to be allowed to come with Samuel wouldn't hesitate to let it go. As horrible as it was it was to send of a family member, and even if it was someone as young as Letha who wanted to do it then they should be allowed to do so.

"Yeah i know," Samuel agreed, they had know about the cancer for a good while now, but he had still been alive. It was hard to get a grip on the fact that someone was just gone. You couldn't see them anymore. It was at times like these Samuel kind of understood religion better, if only from the standpoint of there being something after life was over. It was a comforting thought. But obviously that wasn't how Roman saw it so in some ways it had to be harder. Samuel didn't really see it that way either but in this moment he tried not to think about it too much.

"But you still have your memories," Samuel leaned in and kissed Roman's cheek, "and photos, and stories. I know it's not the same but he isn't completely gone, cus you and all his family will still love him,"
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n
Samuel was right, of course, but memories and stories and photos couldn't compensate for the loss of Hadley's laugh, or the way he still ruffled Roman's hair when he was forty, or the way his eyes crinkled when he smiled. All of that was gone now, and they could only reminisce on what they had lost. And Roman knew that there was absolutely nothing they could do about it.

The funeral was three weeks after Hadley had died, on a cloudy spring morning in October. Roman, Samuel and Harper had travelled up to the family farm, where the funeral was going to be held, a few days before to help get everything ready. The younger kids hadn't wanted to go, and Roman was glad for it, because he didn't want them to see so many mournful people.

Uncle Patrick and Auntie Hillary were still alive and kicking, a fact Roman was grateful for, and he had learned that Hadley's eldest son Ralph was going to be inheriting the farm with his wife Zara and their kids when the time came. It seemed absurd to be glad for such a thing when a family member had just died, but Roman was glad the farm was staying in his family name. It was just nice to know that his family's legacy would be carried on.

Roman and Samuel had slept in Stellan's old bedroom again, and Harper had shared the living room with all the other kids, but Roman had made sure he was okay with it first because he didn't want his son to be uncomfortable. He was sort of glad that Harper wasn't there when they woke up the morning of the funeral, though, because Roman was quite sad and felt like he needed some snuggles from his husband.

He wormed his way under Samuel's arms, resting his head under the other's chin, and inhaled the lovely scent of the man he adored. "I don't want to go," he mumbled.
 

Rabbit

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s a m u e l

Samuel woke up the day of the funeral with Roman having cuddled up in his arms and even if he hadn't verbalized his feelings it wouldn't have taken a genius to understand why that was.

The last couple of days had been a pretty mixed bad. Going out to the farm and meeting Roman's family was always nice, but under the circumstances there was a layer of sadness over every one, even at the times when people were smiling. They were all grieving, Samuel was too. It was weird that Hadley wasn't there when everyone else was gathered. Weird not to see him make Roman smil because he had missed his favorite uncle.

And it all came down to today. The day of the funeral. Samuel held Roman tight and nuzzled his hair a little, "I know, love, I know it's hard, but you're going regret it if you don't go," Samuel knew Roman didn't mean what he was saying, or well his words might b true at the moment, but deep down he probably wanted to see his uncle off.
 

lxngdon

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r o m a n
Roman knew Samuel was right, but still, he would have given everything to not be going to a funeral today. Not because he just didn't want to face the music, but because he wished Hadley was still alive. But there was nothing they could do about that.

He sat up and sighed. Roman looked miserable. He had been crying a lot recently so his eyes were a little red and they had big dark circles beneath them. He pushed a hand through his hair, then reached down and ran his thumb across Samuel's cheekbone. "I love you," he mumbled. He just felt like it needed to be said in this time of sadness and despair.

The morning skipped by, and before they knew it, it was two o'clock and everyone was dressed in black. They were all seated outside, one one of the many paddocks in the valley that had long since been used for livestock and was now just a grassy expanse upon which people could relax in the sun. Rows and rows of chairs had been lined up in front of the grave that had been dug for Hadley's coffin. Which was sitting on a thick wooden table, covered in flowers.

An officiant stood up and began speaking. This wasn't a religious ceremony but he had the timbre of a priest. "Ladies and gentlemen, we are gathered here to celebrate the life of Hadley Brian Hemlock, loving son, brother, and father."

Suddenly it all felt so much more real to Roman. He was sitting between London and Samuel, with Harper on Samuel's other side. He grabbed his husband's and his sister's hands, and ducked his head. He hoped this was over soon.
 

Rabbit

Formerly 'R✿bbit'
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7 am to anywhere between 9 pm to 1 am. Honestly it's pretty random, but I'm on most hours of the day.
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Intermediate, Adept
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Male, Female, Androgynous
Playing Style- Passive or Aggressive
Somewhat passive, I guess? I don't mind anyone else taking the lead but I still want to discuss major plot points.
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romance, modern, drama, modern fantasy, s l i c e o f l i f e.
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Scifi, high fantasy
s a m u e l

Samuel absolutely hated seeing Roman this sad. For a while now he had looked tired and always teary eyed. But as much as Samuel wanted him to always be happy, he knew that he didn't really need cheering up. Because he needed to be allowed to grieve and so what Samuel had to do was to b there for him and comfort him.

And that is what he tried to do the moment they went out of bed that morning. As they went to wake Harper, and had breakfast and got ready he was there by Roman's side, ever so affectionate. If he looked more sad than what had become average he'd pause what they were doing and wrap his arms around him and give him a gentle kiss on the cheek. Just a reminder that he wasn't going through this alone.

Soon enough they were outside listening to the officiant. The weather was nice, but the mood was solemn and sad. When Roman grabbed his hand, Samuel squeezed it and leaned his head against Roman's shoulder for a small moment. His other arm he had placed around Harper's shoulders, Roman couldn't really comfort Harper through his first real facing of the death of a loved one, but Samuel could. He was sad too, terribly so and when one of Roman's cousins stood to speak a little about her father and when they played one of the man's favourite song Samuel shed a couple of tears. But he would always have one had open for Roman to hold and one for Harper.

After an hour or so the actual funeral part of today's activities was coming to a close. The officiant had said his closing words and music started playing. It was time for them all to take a moment to pass Hadley's coffin, place a flower on it if they had one and say one last good bye. Hadley's most immediate family went first of course but then along with some more close relatives it was the Hemlock-Ortegas' turn. Samuel let go of Roman's hand only to rub his back a little as he leaned in to mumble, "Let's go say goodbye?"
 

lxngdon

a mountain biking vampire witch from the future
DONATING MEMBER
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Romance, Fantasy, Modern Fantasy, High School, Historical Fiction
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Sci-Fi, anime, smut, apocalypse, futuristic
r o m a n
Even through his sadness, Roman could recognise that it was a beautiful ceremony. The officiant was truly honouring Hadley for the person that he was, and he was reiterating time and time again the fact that they were not here to mourn the loss of a life, but to celebrate the living of one. Roman wished he could agree.

He didn't want to be sad -- he wished he could think of this occasion as a positive one that was intended to celebrate Hadley's life. But whenever Roman tried to think of the positive things, he just ended up mourning over the fact that he no longer had the luxury of them. And that just made him sadder.

Harper had ended up crying too, though Roman suspected that was less about Hadley and more due to the fact that everyone around him was miserable. When it was time for the Hemlock-Ortegas to venture up to the coffin to say goodbye, Roman picked up the small bunch of flowers he had picked from the gardens and carried them up to the coffin. He nodded to Samuel's words. Now was the time.

They reached the coffin and Roman couldn't help but focus on the fact that his uncle's corpse was laying inside of it. Regardless, he tossed down his flower and watched it as it hit the wood. "I'm going to miss you, Uncle Hadley," he said hoarsely, his eyes brimming over with tears. "I hope that wherever you are, you're not hurting anymore."

Harper started to cry almost at exactly the same time as Roman, and Roman felt terrible, but he couldn't do anything about it. They went back to their seats, and Roman buried his face in Samuel's shoulder, wishing for nothing more than the ability to just make it all right.